a nice day for a ... chinese wedding

this weekend we had the privilege of attending the wedding of one of my co-workers. it was such an honor to be invited. i'm not sure what is 'typical' for chinese weddings, and what was unique for ella and james specifically, but i'll try to give you a quick snapshot (WARNING: quick = long and detailed):

ella and james had actually already been 'married'... so this was the banquet celebration.

upon arrival at the hotel, each of the guests signed a book, and got their picture taken with the bride and groom (prom style). the groom was looking pretty nervous at this point.

ella was wearing a traditional white wedding dress. i've noticed that fashion here tends towards bows, sequins, hello kitty, etc. you know, the 'details'' that make things, well, special. she looked beautiful.

i was a bit nervous about my bare legs (as stockings were in full effect - NUDE stockings, dark stockings, nylons, closed toed shoes, open toed shoes ... you fashionitas get the picture), but ida reassured me that i was fine. probably b/c social transgressions are expected when americans are involved, and therefore easily forgiven. regardless, i was glad i brought a sweater to cover my bare shoulders. meOW.

we sat down in a room with windows all around. the view was breathtaking, looking over the shanghai skyline and the bund (famous waterfront).

chad and i were seated w/ many of my co-workers, including one from london and his wife. that provided for shared commentary, as we all soaked in the experience for the first time. particularly fabulous were the moments when american music laid the backdrop for this sacred event. 'endless love' ... 'i will always love you' (celine) ... 'i do cherish you' ... we stared hard at each other and didn't need words to exchange thoughts. instead, we poured our energy into determining which boy band was responsible for the kind of timeless beauty that transcends international borders.

i couldn't resist throwing my arms around chad's neck and making him dance with me like 7th grade. after that, he asked me to go steady.

there was an 'mc' of sorts that interviewed various family members as well as the groom. then, the music began, and ella came down the aisle singing to her groom. the girls told me that this part was unique for ella, but each bride finds a way to make her ceremony unique. one of the other girls told us she danced at her wedding, etc. when ella and james came together, the 'mc' said a few more things, and the recessional music started ... the same traditional wedding march (mendelssohn) that is played in the states when the couple is announced. i was caught off-guard by the lump in my throat ... my eyes got teary ... and i realized, i didn't have to understand the words to comprehend the moment.

about the food ...

food is put in the middle of a round table, and served on a 'lazy susan' that turns around as each person uses his/her chopsticks to serve themselves. some of you (reeder), who would sooner starve than share a spoon .. may find this style difficult for a long term nourishment plan.

course after course ... it starts with vegetables, then appetizers, then meat, then fish, then chicken, then rice, then dessert. whew. everything was delicious, but we are definitely still getting used to the preparation and presentation style. for example, when i say fish, i mean FISH. last week, the fish was brought to us at the table in a bucket to approve before it was steamed. the process was reminiscent of the tasting before a wine bottle is served to the table. i wondered what i should be looking for. 'um, it's all the way mostly dead? permission to finish him off.' 'no. that's nemo's brother, we can't eat him.'

remember, there are no knives ... so peeling skin, bones, etc. can be tricky w/ chopsticks. at one point, chicken was brought out in a bowl (again, the whole chicken). it was somewhat humorous to all of us, as we tried to pull it apart w/ chopsticks and a dull spoon. graceful? not so much. plenty of photos to come on our various courses. chad laughed at what he described as my 'man-handling' ... i blushed w/ pride as i realized i had taken the first step toward fitting in. GET MINE. or maybe that's just for traffic and supermarkets. oops.

throughout the night, ella changed dresses 3 times (while we were there). i heard rumor of 4. the second was a gold gown ... again, she was gorgeous. the 3rd, a traditional chinese dress. i think this was my favorite. she looked so elegant.

gifts are given in the form of cash. there is a set amount, and it is put into an envelope with a message on the outside. the money is used to pay for the wedding, and the remainder goes to the new couple. makes a lot of sense.

however, what we didn't know, is that a few names would be drawn out of the pile of envelopes. those lucky guests got to be part of a game ... charades of some sort. someone had to be a panda ... someone had to guess what animal he was trying to be. i'm forever grateful that someone was NOT me.

throughout the night, ella and james visited each table for a toast. mostly beer and soft drinks (there is A LOT of coke consumed in this city - haven't seen pepsi) ... i liked this tradition too, as we all got to visit with them, but toasts provided a quick way to make it around a large room.

i asked about a honeymoon, and how long they would be gone. ella thought i was asking how long we had to stay.

stay? oh my ... i feel so lucky to be here, and there is no way i'm going to miss whatever comes next. i fully expect a chinese version of adam sandler to get the dancing started soon.